I have been in a rut the size of the Grand Canyon.
It has been almost 4 months since I have posted a blog entry and almost three months since I did my 5k in Alabama. I honestly haven't truly worked out once since my 5k. It is almost like I had this goal to do it and finish it and then I met that goal and just stopped.
I am sure "ruts" are a common occurrence when you are trying to lose quite a bit of weight, but even though it might be common, it is still annoying as hell.
It is hard not to focus on how much weight I "could've" lost in the past three months....I am trying REALLY hard not to focus completely on that, but I'm trying to make that motivate me to get going again. The passion to do this is still inside of me....excuses, laziness and fear are just holding it back.
Last week we went on vacation and it was glorious. So glorious that I gained 7 pounds. Eating a lot of crap and not exercising will do that to you. I wouldn't take that week back for anything, we had a great time, but now I have a weee bit more work to do than I did a week ago.
I swear I have visions of healthy Heather and fat Heather having conversations....I never really know what they are saying to each other, I am all consumed by what healthy Heather looks like and in the back of my mind there is always this stupid voice (that I honestly think is the devil) saying "you will never look like that, you know you won't, so stop trying". I am no longer going to give that voice a life...I know I can, I know I can....I'm done with "thinking" I can. :-)
