Hi, Self. Nice to Meet You.

Have you ever had those times in life where something happens, you react to it and it is like you are puzzled at your reaction...like, "wait a minute, I'm cooler than that...or...I'm more faithful than that"?

Yep.  Pretty much describes the last few months of my life. 

I have always loved one particular trait about myself.  My ability to let change come in without fear.  I love change, bring it on....it means I'm growing, things are moving....change is good....change is inevitable.  What my brain forgot to tell my heart was that I was in love with positive change.  I am learning to fall in love with change that is not necessarily desirable.  I'm not there yet.  Un-desirable change and I aren't even friends right now, so I am FAR away from loving it and welcoming it, but I am working on it daily with God.  Pretty sure neither one of us knew how stubborn I could be.  Well, He knows....but you know what I mean. 

A daily reminder that my way is not better...my way is not really easier...my way gets me nowhere faster.  Simply because my view is just so limited....I see what could be easier or better in a moment, but God knows what is best for eternity.  Talk about making an already heavy situation even more weighty when you apply an eternal aspect to every single moment, but that weight does lift when you really allow it to all sink in.  Allowing the truth that God is working everything out in His time and it will be beautiful....it is beautiful.  I am making a promise to myself to see the beauty in every single day....to make sure I see the positive blessings that abound...and to handle the moments that are hard with as much grace and love as I can rally.  For me, the only way to do that is to walk really closely with God...talk to him often and intently. 

I am completely at peace with the last few months changing me, but I never want to lose my fearless spirit.  Fear and negativity kill my spirit quicker than any other human trait.  I refuse to let that fade. 

Life is so incredibly fragile and beautiful.  Finding the beauty in all things really is the only time I am at rest.  You have to take it moment by moment, day by day.  Be at rest, see the beauty and experience what God has put before you.  The task at hand is no accident, it is shaping your soul for eternity.